Reconnection, Part 2 During my healing process that followed the discovery of my husband’s betrayal, there were several things that he did to help make me feel safer in my relationship with him. I shared these things in part one. Today, I want to share the changes that took place in my own heart that allowed me to reopen it to him. The main thing that stands out in my mind when I look back on that time is where I chose to put my focus. During the eight years of our marriage before discovery, I assumed that nothing hurtful would ever occur in our relationship simply because in my mind ‘Wayne would never do anything to hurt me.’ So what did I have to worry about? I trusted him. After I found evidence of his betrayal I was not only deeply hurt by his actions, but also had lost all trust in him. I knew that if he hurt me once, he was capable of hurting me again. This left me in a hard situation. I still loved him, but I had no idea how to live life with him now that I knew what he was capable of. This is where the importance of his attitude and actions towards me was so important. While I knew he was capable of hurting me again, I also sensed that his heart was soft to me and that he was actively working to protect me at that time. Knowing this freed me to begin a new way of thinking. I still do not trust my husband. But I am free to love him and enjoy life with him because I trust God. The same One who protected me through the hurt and healed me after it is able to do it again. Please understand, dear readers, that I am not suggesting that I would stay in an actively unsafe situation. If I ever sense that Wayne’s heart has become hard again by living a secret life, I will have to guard my heart by walking away from an unsafe situation. But as long as he is actively fighting to guard his heart and protect mine, I can stay reconnected with him. What has changed in me that has allowed me to reconnect with the one who has hurt me so deeply? My focus and the One in whom I place my trust.