Sexual Humiliation Was he a better lover? Was he better endowed? Am I weak or too feminine? Why did she do ......with him that she never did with me? Maybe if I was a better lover she wouldn’t have cheated. How could she not have used a condom? These painful, humiliating and embarrassing questions and thoughts running through the minds of husbands whose wives are involved with sexual affairs with another man or men strike at the very core of our being. I remember the pain I felt when I found out my wife had done sexual things with her affair partner she had refused to do with me. Statistics have shown that most women involved in sexual affairs give sex in return for emotional connection. Most men involved with sexual affairs give emotional connection in return for sex. It has to do with the way men and women are wired. Men are more sexually focused while women are more emotionally focused. In fact most women who recover from the sexual affair will admit that the sex was awful or humiliating. They felt they had to give the sex in order to keep the man interested or involved. Unfortunately the sleaze ball man will use the affair insanity to take advantage of the women’s perceived emotional needs. If you are a man and struggling with these issues please know that you are not alone and that this has nothing at all to do with you or your sexuality. This is not the woman you married. Some people liken it to an alien that had taken over the person involved with the affair. They will do the craziest, hurtful, unhealthy things while in the grips of the powerful addiction. There is recovery possible from these issues. Don’t let them eat you from the inside out. Don’t let them change the way you treat women or your view of women in general. There is help out there.