One of the Biggest Mistakes You Can Make in Trying to Heal from Infidelity

Samuel shares a pivotal mistake unfaithful spouses make in recovery work.

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Samuel, i watched the Brene

Samuel, i watched the Brene Brown most recent talk on courage on netflix. Her talk on vulnerability is putting the "playing victim" into perspective for me as a BS. but i would like to hear if i am incorrect regarding my applying it to the US. playing victim is not being vulnerable, omitting the "i will do what it takes" is not being vulnerable. constantly coming up with "but you did" is playing the victim. A "but" is saying you did X that to caused me to do Y. This keeps the BS in a state of stuck trying to trust the US.

i get it....agreed...

vulnerability is not about blame...it's about sharing our hearts and laying ourselves open in a safe environment.  sounds like the environment and/or heart of the unfaithful spouse in your situation is not very safe.  i'm sorry it's that way.  it's not safe to play the victim and it's not safe to get defensive, that's for sure.