Should I Stay or Go After Infidelity?

The absolute last thing anyone needs after the personal discovery or experience of infidelity is more shame and isolation. However, two of the most commonly experienced emotions after infidelity has been discovered are both paralyzing shame and decimating isolation. At, we use this phrase quite often: “everyone says what they will do when infidelity happens... until it actually happens.” It’s just not that easy to make a decision. After all, you could be giving your unfaithful partner a chance to wreck your heart and life all over again. Conversely, you could be missing out on a potentially wonderful miracle of restoration that changes your lives, and the lives of witnesses to your marital reconciliation, forever. These decisions cannot be made in a vacuum of inexperience, primitive coping mechanisms, and outright ignorance. Healing happens when infidelity-specific experts have a chance to evaluate, assess, and employ new approaches to the trauma that infidelity has created within the relationship and quite possibly, the entire family. Today, Samuel shares some do’s and don’ts after the discovery of infidelity, and helpful insights in navigating these troubled waters of uncertainty.

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Designed specifically for wayward spouses, Hope for Healing is a supportive, nonjudgmental environment for you to heal and develop empathy. Over the years, this 17-week, small group course has helped thousands of people find hope, set healthy boundaries and move toward extraordinary lives.

"The sooner after D-Day you can become involved in Affair Recovery, the better. I went from not being welcome in my own home to sharing a bed with my wife once again — much sooner than I expected. EMS Online helped us to communicate effectively, and Hope for Healing really helped me understand the issues I have with myself. Meeting strangers that are in the exact same situation as you is so helpful. They become your friends and confidants." — E., Pennsylvania | April 2021 HFH Participant

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