While I am not married, I am in a significant long term relationship and dealing with infidelity. We are about 8 weeks out from discovery. I have found your videos so incredibly helpful, both for my perspective as the betrayed as well as a peek into the perspective of the unfaithful. I have been through some significant losses in my life and this situation has been by far the absolute most painful. One of the most frustrating things is dealing with the unpredictability of my emotions. Sometimes I'm fine, sometimes I'm so angry.

I do have a couple questions if you have any tips. First, how do you deal with being overly suspicious? My boyfriend is really participating in recovery with our therapist. He's doing the work. Still, I get irrationally suspicious of where he is, what he's doing, how he's feeling...even when I know he is exactly where he's supposed to be. I hate feeling that way.
Second, though we are far off from it, I don't know how to deal with the idea of physical intimacy. The idea of being intimate again makes me so uncomfortable and almost repulsed. It's not that I'm not attracted to him; it's just the idea of physical intimacy feels contaminated. He took something I consider sacred and special (I was never a casual sex person), and shared that with someone else. It's so painful. Do you have any suggestions on healing the trauma?