Infidelity Trauma: An Interview with a Specialist Part 2

Watch Part 1
>Viewing Part 2

Samuel interviews MJ Denis, a trauma specialist, about how couples can heal from infidelity.

Add New Comment:


There is so much hope in this

There is so much hope in this video. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!

Thank you

I love this. As a betrayed spouse, there are days I feel like a stranger to myself. Loss of control of emotions is frightening. The terrible guilt, shame, pain and internal strife caused when you can’t seem to control yourself can be unbearable. Being almost two years out from original d-day and there are still moments that I lose myself. My spouse looks at me with concern as if I may be broken beyond repair. So we sit there in our mutual shame and seem hopeless. Thank you for giving so much hope and shining a light on the body science that fuels the trauma.

Thank you so very much for

Thank you so very much for this two-part interview. I’m the betrayed spouse and am almost 4 years post D-Day. Watching the interview helps me understand why I experienced what I did early on. I strongly suggest that thr interview be added to the EMSO, Harboring Hope and Hope for Healing courses. I believe it will help many individuals and couples in the future. Thank you, Samuel & MJ!


Samuel, I don't know what inspired this interview....I am so grateful that what I am experiencing for the past 2.5 years has a definition/explanation.

I do hope that the next installment addresses the dynamic that continues in my When I share a wound with my UH, I don't get empathy, validation, or acknowledgement. I get, "I'm sorry. When I say I'm sorry, I mean it," repeated to I feel re-traumatized. No healing takes place.

Thank you for doing this interview! I do hope that it gets included in all the AR material/courses early on (as a single video).


I am so very grateful for your two last blogs. They explained so much of what I feel. I feel some hope and relief at last. It couldn't have come at a better time. Thank you so much

Trauma Part 2

So much knowledge in this segment, again, it would have been so helpful 3 years ago to know how trauma affects the emotions and mind. So thankful, grateful to know I am not crazy-- Would love to send this to our previous marriage counselors who basically said I was crazy!!! MJ described me and my reactions to the trauma of infidelity 'spot on.' Thank you from the bottom of my heart, the reactions really are the way she describes them. I will rest easier in my surviving days knowing I am suffering from trauma of the infidelity and not irrational emotion from a post-menopausal woman. Great interview, meaningful dialogue and much hope for those of us still on the journey even 4 years out. Thank you MJ and Samuel.......


Unusual end?

The blog seemed to be interrupted at the end in the middle of a response to a question. Intentional or corrupted video file?

Blog interruption

I agree, stinsonguy — the blog ended abruptly mid sentence by MJ. Hopefully they will respond and correct that. Otherwise I found it to be extremely helpful in explaining my emotions in 4 years of affair recovery.

Blog Error


Thank you for bringing this to our attention! Our team has updated the video file so that the ending is included.

To healing,

The Hope-Now Team

So Helpful

Thank you for these interviews. It’s been seven weeks since d-day and I have never felt this traumatized before in my life. Today is actually the first day that I don’t feel like I can get out of bed, but these videos have helped me so much in understanding that this is not depression (well, maybe a little.) I am actually just exhausted from 7 weeks of constant triggering. My husband’s AP had been messaging me under a fake name and finding creative ways to drip more information. She also sent me a package full of sex toys they used. My life and world feels completely shattered and I know it’s not a viable long term solution, but this bed and your videos is where I find my safety today.

i'm so sorry....

hi Mimi5, thank you for posting.   i'm incredibly sorry for the pain and the hurt you're dealing with.  that's awful.  i wouldn't want to get out of bed either.  have you been able to find any help just for you?  what are you doing (if anything as i know you're exhausted and rightly so) for your own healing and well being?  anything I can do to help?


What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas