Q&A Is My Situation a Common One?

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My husband has confessed to wanting to be married to a friend of mine. He says he has not done anything with her or approached her in any way sexually or emotionally and says he just liked her so much that he wanted a marriage with her. He went on to describe explicitly what he wanted to do with her sexually and felt comforted when being around her. He said God told him to tell me that he wanted her in marriage and what he wanted from her. He felt if he was thinking wrong thoughts that I should know all of them. After more discussion he said that there were many women he wanted to marry during our 20 years of marriage. I am crushed to think that he wanted a marriage with a friend of mine. I feel like I need to know who else he wanted this with as I have found out about others he wanted in the last four years since disclosure. When I find out it is like immense pain all over again. Is this common for the unfaithful to have done nothing emotionally or physically, only to have all of these disgusting thoughts in their head and to say them to their wife and now that he has shared all of this with me should I know about the others? I am heartbroken and stuck in the thought that he wanted marriage with another that I knew personally.



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