Q&A How Do I Persevere through the Anger and Break the Stalemate?

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Question: 

I’m the unfaithful. It’s been 11 months since D-Day from a 6 week affair. I want nothing more than to repair the rift between my wife and I and to achieve this better life and marriage you talk about; but I’m losing hope. We did EMSO right after discovery, cycled through 3 counselors and still spiraled downward until she demanded we separate at month 8. Her anger toward me only increased with every “recovery” effort I made. We’re back in the same house again, but “only for our daughter” according to my wife. We’re roommates, and she avoids any interaction with me whenever our daughter is not around. We haven’t touched since 2 days after D-Day and she still barely looks at me. I’ve done individual counseling and have worked hard to find the better me after all of this. I’m grateful for the help I’ve gotten for my own issues, but it hurts to watch her refuse to get any help of her own and knowing I caused this. My question is how long do I persevere through daily hatred and avoidance and how do I break the stalemate? I know deep in my heart this only being together for our daughter as my wife wants isn’t a sustainable or healthy way to live- no matter how much I wish it was for our daughters sake. How do I convince her that you’re telling the truth, that recovery is possible?

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