Q&A Why Am I Struggling with Compassion and Understanding?

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Question: 

How do you guys, Leslie and John, do it? How do you have compassion and understanding for those that commit affairs, connect with them and provide therapy for them regularly? How do you understand and care for them when you've never committed affairs yourselves? It seems understandable if, for example, they've had very terrible childhoods or had been severely abused or had been taken advantage of their whole life, that they would have affairs. But for people who didn't have that kind of experience, I'm having trouble seeing these type of adulterers as normal humans. I'm having trouble seeing them as good people when they've made a hundred small selfish and immoral decisions to get them to a place of full blown cheating. My intention is forgive my spouse for the affairs, but I have trouble understanding and compassion, especially when he brings up his reasons for affairs. What's wrong with me that I'm so judgmental? That I have trouble with compassion and understanding?

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