Q&A Do All Men Compartmentalize?

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Question: 

I’ve been researching about compartmentalization. I have heard you say that it’s a hard thing to explain to a betrayed spouse, especially women, and that men are able to do it better than women. I’m having a hard time seeing this in my husband and he says that he was unable to do this. His affair was a fling with few sexual contacts with one woman over the span of a week and 2 days. It was very short lived. But he says that the whole time, his guilt and shame were eating him alive, that it was hard to look at me and that sometime during the this week, he actually drove to a bridge and thought about driving off of it because of what he had done. He even became physically ill, vomiting, during this time due to his anxiety, although I didn’t know that was the reason at the time. I discovered the infidelity because he came home and told me. He said he couldn’t live with himself anymore without me knowing what he had done, that it was eating at him. So my question is, Is this typical of compartmentalization? Do all men compartmentalize? How does this correlate with the rising number of women cheating if we don’t do it very well?

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