Q&A How Do I Move Forward If My Mate Won't Admit What Happened?

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Question: 

I submitted a question over 13 weeks ago before my husband and I started EMS regarding him not remembering what he did the night he cheated. We are now two years out from finding out through me getting an STD. I only found out because of that. But his story that he’s persistently sticking to is I don’t remember I was blacked out drunk. He took a lie detector and failed it. He said he’d take another but we aren’t sure that would bring any peace. I’ve had to ask him time and again to “find out” then if he doesn’t remember and all he tells me is he did what he could and there is nothing else he can do but move forward and be consistent. I have no reason to believe him based on his past actions through our entire relationship and I feel it would be extremely foolish to move forward blindly with him. I don’t want my family to be torn apart but I don’t want to place myself into the same path again. I want the information of what he did. I don’t feel safe with “I don’t remember”. The possibility of him being drugged has came up through counseling but I’m not too sure of that and definitely don’t want to put my eggs in one basket just to give him an out on his bad choices and not wanting to own up and take responsibility.

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Rick, I'm in a similar

Rick, I'm in a similar situation. My wife was in a long affair. Starting around October of 2016 up to discovery and still up to around November of 2018. I can't really say when or if the communications stop due to the fact they met at her work and of course spoof calls. Over all she will not admit to having a affair. I get answers like, I did a lot of bad things like wondering what other guys would be like, I wanted other guys to admire me, I had a audaltres mind, and so on. Other things like why she had the front door light on, why are you guarding your phone when I'm around unexpectedly, why do you look for the guy when you walk by his apartment. And so on. But that's when I get answers like, I don't remeber, or I don't know why I do that. Well with tons of information that backs up the affair with both parties. She still won't say what happened. In a good note. We are starting EMSO soon. When i discovered Samuels bogs on youtube, my wife got interested in AR. Over the last 14 months she has been working on why she would of done it. So with God, AR, EMSO I pray that there is hope. Thank you Rick.