Hi Rick. Before this question was answered by you I got further disclosure that has devastated me. He has had three affairs at the beginning of our marriage and a 20 year off and on physical and eventually emotional affair. When she got divorced, he stopped having sex with her but continued the conversations because he truly enjoyed her ego stroking and her constant praise of everything and anything he said I did not support. She encouraged his 6 month affair and helped him with information about divorce. He ended the "friendship" because upon discovery of his last affair I told him he could not have any female acquaintances if he even wanted to have a chance with me. I did not know the truth about them then. She was very upset that he was trying to return to me and that he was even listening to me but he did not relent and told her he would not be calling her and she should never call him either. I have gone through all that time of pain and was beginning to see a ray of sunlight and now I feel like the pit of hell opened up and swallowed me whole. The grief is unbelievable and I know I don't want to go through the effort it would take to get all the truth. I am exhausted mentally, emotionally and physically. This made me realize how little he thought of me, how disdainful he was of me and how naïve I was. She was the wife and I was the mother. What did he need me for? But, it has given me a new sense of the need to be set free to be whoever I am, should have been, and will be in the future. I have nothing to lose.....I never had it to begin with. Tears............