Q&A How Can the Wayward Spouse Process Grief?

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Question: 

I find myself struggling with some of these videos. Tonight I watched the video for this week about grief. It was totally focused on the betrayed. I don't have problem with that as they are the ones whose world has been torn apart. Does AR ever do anything to help the unfaithful with their grief? The lesson for week 5 is from Harboring Hope a session for the Betrayed. I found it difficult to work my answers.

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Communicating/Help For Unfaithful From the Betrayed's Position

Thank you for posting this Rick. From the betrayed's perspective, indeed there is a lot of help for me which is great. As we are working through this, my wife is trying her best to show me her efforts to be a better person/ spouse, but I'm struggling to find areas to back her up for her recovery. From what I'm learning, a big part of our issue was a lack of communication and continued relationship building that got is into this nightmare to start with! As strange is as this feels to write this, she's doing everything she can to support me (which is very helpful as my mind is very cyclical right now) but I'm feeling isolated in helping her with her struggles. (Maybe I'm nuts, co-dependent, Lord knows what)? The way I see it, in our case, we both are showing that we are willing to do whatever it takes to make this work, but as the betrayed male (I think?) I'm feeling much of the same emotions as my wife (shame, guilt, embarrassment, anger, fear, insecurity,)etc. but feeling these things for much different reasons. We're going to be attending the March retreat, and very eager to get input from you and your team. More videos that help the betrayed understand and communicate effectively in recovery would be great and possibly help bridge any gap in lack of communications that brought this nightmare into our lives. Maybe I'm trying to help prevent relapse or weak, but time will will tell I've been told...