Q&A How Do I Handle My Mate's Lying?

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I don't know what to do about my husband’s lying. I'm sure it’s normal sometimes for things to get worse before they get better, but he just doesn't get it. The problem I have is, I don't think, I know he is lying. We are the product of an affair. I was his AP and very naive thinking he must love me to walk away from his 36 year marriage. He said it was a loveless marriage and I was everything he had ever dreamed of etc. We married. Life was good until things went bad at his job. He left after finding a new job, where he met the affair partner. He says the relationship was never consummated. He claims the one time he was at her house he could not perform out of guilt, but I recovered deleted text from his phone that took place right after he left there. His story is so full of holes because it is nothing more then very weak answers to my questions. He had started seeing her again before he left that job and went back to first job. I have also recovered a text conversation from his last day there. He says he will take a polygraph. Maybe I should just let him although I believe it will be a waste of money. If it proves him guilty he will claim false positive. He says I figured it all out and there is no more to tell. When I could get him to tell it again it's the same old rehearsed story always skipping to the days I had questioned. It is beyond insulting. There is so much more of this ridiculousness but I don't have room. I am constantly being gaslit and don't think I can hang on much longer.



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