We attended EMS Weekend last month. I am the unfaithful wife who broke her marriage vows the first year of marriage. I was 19 when we got marriage. I'm now 50. Nevertheless, by the third day of EMS Weekend the constant labeling had me crumbling for a brief moment. How is it helpful to label someone for the rest of their life when they have changed directions? My husband left EMS Weekend desiring to be a Victor or Overcomer - because on the third day in small group I blew like a teapot and told him that I think he wants to be labeled as a victim forever. That was a turning point. Was this intentional on AR's part - to push me to my limit and scream at my husband (something I never would have done). My other question is why continue to label people as "betrayed" when they are a Victor / Overcomer? We are in a very good place in our marriage and considering vow renewal when the time is right. Each time we watch an AR video or read the 6 week BEMS content we are being drawn back into victimhood and reminded of who I used to be 30 years ago. We are not finding it helpful - even though we love our small group and our leaders.