Q&A Is it Too Much to Ask for More Sex?

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My husband had a deeply entangled emotional and sexual affair for a year. She has now moved away. Our whole marriage (of 7 years), I was almost always the one to initiate sex. And he often turned me down. He said his sex drive was not that high and he was stressed out about work. We would have sex about once a week. It made me feel sad and rejected that he didn't want to have sex more. His affair has been over for 6 months now and he will not have sex with me. He says that it’s too soon for him and he doesn’t want to deal with me crying after sex. I also think he doesn’t want to have sex with me because he is still in love with her. I do not think they are in contact anymore. And I don’t think that he is looking at porn because I look at his computer a lot. Is it normal for a man not to have sex with his wife this long after an affair? Also, am I being unreasonable that I want to have sex more than once a week? I know that he had sex with her more than once a week, so is it too much to ask for him to have more sex with me too? I feel like he needs to put the same amount of energy into our marriage as he did into his affair. He says that is unrealistic and unsustainable.



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