Q&A When Is the Right Time to Talk about Trust?

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Question: 

My wife and I are currently 8 months out from our last d-day after her relatively short 6-week affair. Adding to the complexity, my wife still has limerent feelings for her affair partner, and I recently discovered that she has been unintentionally deceiving me about how she acts and speaks at work for over 10 years. Since I had no idea about this side of her personality, I struggle with wondering if I truly know her and constantly wonder if she's hiding anything else. She has been doing a lot of work to figure out the why, and is actively setting new boundaries and working on making herself healthy. Even with that, I still struggle with trust and wonder if I'm being deceived in some way, and as a result, she's getting discouraged. How can we get unstuck, or are we focusing on trust too early in the process?

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