The Shocking Truth About Trust

If you don't know how you'll ever trust again or if you don't know what to do to regain a lost trust, then read this ebook. It explains the basis of trust as well as the three components for trust.

Additionally, tips for both the hurt spouse and the unfaithful spouse are given to assist in their journey toward wholeness. This practical advice comes from decades of clinical experience in the treatment of couples and individuals dealing with infidelity. I hope you'll take advantage of this valuable resource.

Here is the eBook titled:

We'd love for you to comment about your thoughts on the eBook below.



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Comment on E-Book version of The Shocking Truth About Trust

I have just finished reading the E-Book version of this book sent to me by the Affair Recovery website. It is an excellent read. I learned about healing processes for myself, the betrayed spouse, but also learned a perspective of my husbands view. A lot of what I
read brought tears of painful thoughts but allowed me to think a bit more clearly. I sent the email to my husband and hope that he will read this book. We are having communication issues and living in 2 separate countries is making things a lot harder. Thank you for the information within this book! It gave me a little hope to continue on, at least for today.......

Stay on your own side of the street

Gladly...actually, I think I will construct an inpenatrable barrier between my side of the street and his side of the street!
I don’t seem to be able to get passed the managing immediate pain step..., doing the Bootcamp Day 2 highlighted to me I have an entire world of pain coping strategies and the only Step that I believe to be conceptually effective is Grieve and Accept however....

When I look into Grieve and Accept it’s like a infinitely long black tunnel and ALL the pain I’ve ever felt in my entire life lurks in there, in the various intervals like some I shut that and go back to Numb, Ignore, Avoid, Transmit...

How does one begin to Grieve?

Begin to Grieve

Surrender to the truth about all of it. Don't hide from any of seek out counseling so that you can look at it all, piece by piece.

There's a lot more to betrayal than the sex

I'm with you -I'm there -I'm struggling with Vietnam war betrayal AND my wife's. I'm taking fire on 3 sides - there's always a story that's worse!

the shocking truth about trust

I've been unfaithful. I betrayed the person I love with all my heart.I'm reading the book and I cry for shame and guilt. I will do all I can to help the person I love find the road to forgiveness even if he does not want to be with me again. Thanks for your help. I feel lost but I try to fight with your support too. sorry if I do not speak well. I'm Italian and I use the translator. thank you very much

I'm finally realizing what I didn't want to face

I have been struggling with my husband on and off for some 10 years. 4 years ago I found out there was someone else, but I wasn't able to determine what exactly happened and if it was still going on. The constant lying and denial broke me until I started to lose my love for him. The more I've tried to understand his thinking and observe his actions, I have realized that he never truly loved me. He's not really capable of the deep vulnerable love that can be so fulfilling. I don't see him having it with our children and now I clearly see he doesn't have it for me. He never really did, now that I look back at our 35 years together. His family doesn't have it either. And I can see similar traits in my birth family. Some people just don't know how to love other people. But they do like to be cared for, that I know. They are ultimately, selfish in that regard and they take advantage of the people who love them.

The saddest part of this is I don't think I will ever be able to fully love again. That part of me has died.

Saddest part

I’m with you here. I’m coming to the realization that I married a cheater.
He had cheated on his first wife after he had caught her cheating on him. Early on in our relationship together BEFORE we got married, I had asked why he had divorced. He said it was because he had caught his wife cheating on him.
What he didn’t tell me, is that he had also had a revenge affair before they divorced each other.
He has told me that the divorce was mutual. The marriage lasted less than two years.
I’m married to someone who cheats when he thinks he has been slighted in any way. He has held grudges for years with potential clients because he didn’t feel that they were fair with him.
He’s been negative towards others in his sporting world who have had the attention put on them and he feels he should have that attention. “Hey, I’m special because. . . , you should write an article about me.”
The years of lying and deception have nearly destroyed any love I have had for him.
I still see that it is possible for him to be the man that I thought I married so many decades ago.
He was adventurous, he was willing to work hard to have a successful business, he did help others without having something in return from them, he was my partner in many ways.
He has been ultimately selfish and used those who have cared for him and who have loved him.
“The saddest part of this is I don’t think I will be ever” able to fully trust loving him again. I believe that part of me has died.
He has severely injured that part of me so many times and I am not sure if I can ever recover from the damage caused.

When the unfaithful has narcissistic and psychopathic tendencies

When is sharing information on healing dangerous? I am committed to my healing and to the process of his personal recovery. If the two can come together that would be great but is not my priority. Especially now seeing his disfunction and possible personality disorders. He’s all in as far as his “healing” and mine goes. He wants to be a better man. A different human. But given his personality traits and all that has been discovered I fear him. I fear helping him “heal” as it is only a ploy for him to perfect his “image” he so desperately wants. And seeks through validation of others. Are there rules or boundaries to what information is safe and unsafe for him to see. For example the book above on trust. Couldn’t that just be a roadmap for someone like him?

The Truth About Trust

Thank you so very much. I'm sure this will help me immensely. I'm not there yet. God Bless you :)

I am the betrayed spouse and

I am the betrayed spouse and this has honestly been the most helpful article I have read. I found out that my husband was having an affair last Valentine’s Day with someone in his office at work. He was texting her next to me on the couch. He initially lied over and over about details of the affair to try not to look so bad. But that made things worse. Even if he eventually has come clean about it all I still can’t bring myself to believe he has told me everything. To this day I still don’t know what he has told the truth about because of the months of lies after the discovery. Not knowing the truth and him not thinking I deserve the truth prevents me from moving forward to the next step: forgiveness. I need to talk about the affair to process the pain and heal. He gets mad when I want to talk about it and thinks I am just trying to rake him over the coals. The Listen chapter quotes hit home for me.

What type of affair was it?

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