Q&A Is It Possible They Never Had Sex?

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Question: 

My husband began an affair with a co-worker in 2005, which he says was emotional only. He told me he ended the affair in 2012 when he saw her staring lustfully into the eyes of another man at work, who was also married. Furious and heartbroken, he said he wanted nothing more to do with her; however, I have since learned that he never stopped chatting with her via the work messaging system. I'm glad he finally admitted the truth about the continued chatting, and I'm happier still that this past February 3rd he sent her an end letter, calling off all further communication. However, I'm finding it near impossible to believe that he never had sex with her. He took her out to dinner whenever he was in NYC for work, which was once-a-month; he gave her gifts, including jewelry; he chatted with her daily. Is it really plausible that he never had sex with her? I'm having a hard time believing that to be true. I wish he would agree to a polygraph. We are starting EMSO for couples tomorrow; so perhaps he will agree to the polygraph in time. For now, I feel stuck in a waiting zone, wondering when the other shoe is going to drop.

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