8 months from discovery, currently in week 9 of EMSO and week 1 of Harboring hope. My husband is doing well, being more authentic than he's ever been, in his entire life. I can see him becoming more of the man that God intended him to be but I can't imagine a scenario in which I could ever feel satisfied in a marriage with this kind of history. I realize that romanticism doesn't exist, and my since of worth or importance can't be tied to a man or marriage, but isn't part of marriage knowing that there's someone who has chosen you above all others and finds you important in their life? How can I ever feel special or chosen by him after being unchosen during the time he spent with the affair partner. How do other people make peace with that? How can a marriage with this kind of history ever be a place that I can feel special or important? I'd like to keep my family together but don't know if I can ever love him the way that I did before I learned of his affair. Any information or suggestions you can offer are appreciated.