I, like so many, am trying to make sense of my spouses infidelity and continued betraying behavior. The coveting of his false self is baffling to say the least. I wonder if I am dealing with OCD of protecting the false self or a narcissist. He will lie, cheat and steal (from our relationship) if squeezed in the slightest way, yet lives like a slob in our relationship. I truly believe there are several narcissistic traits in the mix but cannot comprehend the continued behaviors that leave me truly feeling unsafe. I continue to share feelings and express needs but they seem to fall on deaf ears.