Q&A Can I Heal While Spouse is Active in an Affair?

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Question: 

Hi Rick,

My wife and I recently attended EMS Weekend after several disclosures of my wife's infidelity with multiple APs. She is still in an affair with a new AP since returning from EMS Weekend which she hid during the weekend. I am struggling with how to heal and move forward when she doesn't want to help with the process, focusing on her own path and needs. We are separated and only see each other when with our daughter. I don't think she understands or wants to see what the path would need to be for us to face our issues and heal, regardless of marital reconciliation (at this point I'm trying to focus on my own spiritual growth and giving up my desires for any particular outcome) I feel like I'm in a painful limbo, feeling like I need to suck it up and continue putting the puzzle together in the dark, as I don't believe she will turn the light on. I'm also concerned that she doesn't see the need to pursue help for herself because of a possible addiction as I'm worried how all this will affect our daughter in the future. I know I can't make her get help which puts me back in a place of limbo. I appreciate your feedback and guidance.

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