How do I get a mentor in this tiny rural area? The town has 5,000 people, the county has under 50,000. The nearest city is 45 minutes & 45 miles away. I'm dealing with daily criticism, near constant invalidation of my feelings for the last 4 years and virtually all compliments for the last 30 years. She floods and I don't have the magic words at just that moment so of course that means i have no compassion, no humility, no empathy which in turn means of course we have failed and separation is the only answer. Yet other times she wants to work it out. She can be sweet as honey one part of the day then melts down others. D day was almost 4 years to the day.