I always gave my wife the 'benefit of the doubt'. That she was honest and committed to our marriage despite her shortfalls. That there was something deep in the past affecting her actions. I felt I needed to 'hang in there' for her. Love her above all else and that in the end that would help heal her. When I look back, it's seems she took advantage of that. My mistake. My trust was naivety. She knew what I needed to hear from her, and see her do, to gain my trust, while she played me like a violin. Dishonesty was the 'norm' for her. I didn't see it.