Q&A How Do I Let Go of My Feelings for the Affair Partner?

I was in my affair for six months when I was caught and it went on even after D-Day. In February I said goodbye to the affair partner after she went on vacation to Mexico with her family and had sex with some guy she met there. Even then I wanted to go with her. I still have thoughts of her every day many times a day. I still feel that I want to be with her even though she cheated on me. I actually believe I blame myself because before she went I told her I thought we should quit. We had plans of living together and getting married. How do I get over these feelings cause I want to work on my marriage? I can’t move forward with these thoughts constantly causing doubt. I have a counselor and pastor but I am still on the fence even though I know what God wants me to do and what everyone tells me is right.