Q&A How Do I Remain Positive about Moving Forward?

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We just finished EMSO week 9 Forgiveness. It was an easier topic for me despite being the betrayed spouse. After my husband asked for a divorce in December, I worked with a counselor to forgive his actions for myself and my kids. Months later he asked to reconcile and I had to choose if I wanted to commit to that forgiveness. I have because of his actions and progress we've made. This week was a really tough week for him struggling with forgiving himself which I appreciate and want to support him through. However he also struggles with forgiving me for past wounds which caused feelings of neglect and resentment. I have taken responsibility for my past actions and have sincerely apologized for them without excuses or buts which he thanked me for but is still stuck. He knows he needs to get additional counseling to help him through this and plans to. I'm finding it difficult to keep moving forward, keep giving, until he is able to do this. It doesn't help I feel him pushing me away or avoiding me when working on this which causes triggers and emotional flooding for me. After this week's lesson on horizontal forgiveness, I also question if I'm safe and his inability to forgive the past and himself is toxic and we don't have a chance to reconcile. How do I remain positive about moving forward and how can I support him during this time?



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