Q&A How Do You Handle Having OCD and a Sexual Addiction at the Same Time?

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Since D-Day I have developed OCD, so a lot of intrusive sexual thoughts or thoughts about past affair partners or pornography. Additionally, I struggle with fear and shame almost any time I’m in contact with a woman; fear of finding her attractive, of sexual thoughts about her, of objectifying her. This fear has made it hard to look women in the eye when talking to them, because internally I’m so focused on not looking at their chest that all of my focus ends up being on their chest. Going into public at all, even for a walk, grocery shopping or being at work, has been made difficult because of my OCD. In my last question, Rick said that rules around my intrusive thoughts would worsen the OCD. At the same time, I have a sexual addiction. It is now very difficult to discern between actual temptations and OCD thoughts that come out of fear. This has made it almost impossible for my girlfriend to feel safe. So how do you handle having OCD and a sexual addiction at the same time? With OCD, it’s important not to avoid things that trigger intrusive thoughts, and with sexual addiction it might be wiser to avoid things that trigger a temptation. I’m working with a therapist that has experience with OCD, but is not an expert in infidelity.



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