Q&A Should There Be Closure with the Affair Partner?

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D-day was in Oct 2016, I don't believe there was any sexual contact after that but there continued to be contact and lies about it, only disclosing after I had proof. We have been working on our relationship and connecting better than ever, both of us felt that way and told each other so. In May, my husband had a conversation with the Affair Partner while updating software on a piece of equipment for his work, she is the service manager where they get their equipment from. During this conversation, he told her that things were about the same with us, that he thought about her all the time, asked her if she thought about him and other things. He had told me they spoke but nothing personal discussed. When I found out about these things and confronted him, he didn't deny them but said that he didn't mean any of it, he was on the phone with her too long and this is just how they spoke to each other. He says she did not respond to his questions. To me, this was worse than the initial disclosure because I felt like we had made so much progress. He has not had any conversations with her since then that I am aware of and seems to be committed to us, he has avoided seeing her by sending others to pick up parts etc. The question is should he tell her that he is committed to his marriage vs leaving things open with her?



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