Q&A Is There Hope for a Feeling of Oneness Again?

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Question: 

I am struggling heavily with verses in the bible that speak of oneness. We were one. My husband, cut us apart by falling in love and having sex with another married woman, severing our intimate oneness. Not only were we split back to into two, a third party was introduced. When my husband and I have sex now I feel ashamed before God because I'm knowingly sharing in a four person sexual union. We are 4 months from D-Day, working hard on recovery and healing. I'm doing counseling, EMSO, HH, & EMDR. Things are improving overall, but I find the loss of, oneness devastating because it's permanent. New wedding rings can replace tainted ones. New memories can be made. Hearts can be mended, though scarred. Triggers can decrease, and images can fade. New vows can even be made. But one can't become four and magically transform back to one again. We can't declare ourselves, one any more than we could declare ourselves to be virgins. Some things, once lost, are simply gone forever. So even if we recover otherwise, how can I ever feel that our sexual union before God is pure, now that, His art has been desecrated?

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