Q&A What Do We Do from Here?

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My husband uses a tactic to divert attention away from the concept we are trying to discuss. I am going to call it "The Monday Tuesday tactic". This is how it works: I try to discuss the problem of him having a conversation of a highly sexual nature with another woman. He denies that this ever happened and demands that I tell him when I think it happened. I say, "Last Monday Suzanne asked you to work on her computer and insinuated that she would like you to work on her, as well. You laughed and said, "Well, my billing rate of $90 an hour can cover a lot of things! Ha Ha Ha." And then the two of you continued the sexual banter right in front of me and kept it up even after I walked away." He answers by saying, "No that happened on a Tuesday. And I can prove it happened on a Tuesday because of blah, blah, blah." I say, "It doesn't matter if it happened on a Monday or a Tuesday. It matters that you and Suzanne had this sexual conversation and then you went to her house when her husband was not home, supposedly to work on her computer." He says, "But we did not talk on Monday. We talked on Tuesday, so you are wrong." I try to continue with my complaint about the sexual nature of the conversation and the opportunity they created to make it possible to engage in sex together. He responds by arguing that he talked to her on Tuesday and continues arguing about Tuesday until I give up in anger and frustration. The question is What do we do from here? I went into way too much detail. The example I used is something that happened and even quite a bit worse. He is still lying and denying. I need the truth - and all of it.



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