Q&A At What Point Is It Unhealthy to Be Avoiding Events Because the Affair Partner May Go or Avoiding Places Because They Once Went There Together?

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My husband worked for the church and had an emotional affair with his co-worker who was also a family friend. The slippery slope of friendship and infidelity behaviors started a year before they fully entered an emotional affair and I was very uneasy about this inappropriate friendship they were creating right from the start. By the time D-Day came earlier this year I had been insecure and frustrated in my marriage and with my husband’s friendship for nearly 2 and a half years. I have a lot of negative memories from this period, even more triggers since D-Day now I know the full truth of their sneaking around and living in a small town there are a lot of physical reminders on a daily basis. I wonder how you strike the balance between managing reminders and triggers while not living a life of avoidance. At what point is it unhealthy to be avoiding events because the affair partner may go or avoiding places because they once went there together?



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