Q&A Why Am I so Concerned About the Affair Partner?

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Question: 

Why am I still so concerned about my husband’s affair partner and what she thinks? How can I let it go? I know that my husband affaired down and this girl has nothing on me. Our recovery since d-day has been going great. We are really in a great spot and my marriage is stronger than ever and is growing daily! But why 19 months later I am still so concerned about her? I have written before and mentioned she continues to post things negative things about my husband and myself on social media, we live in the same town so I see her often, and she still works with my husband. but why do I care so much? Why can’t I let this person go- she is wasting space in my head yet I think about her, make decisions like when I grocery shop based on her. We are currently expecting another baby and we are keeping it a secret because I am afraid of her reaction. I don’t understand.

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