Q&A Why Do I Want to Indulge in Thoughts of the Other Women?

To watch the video please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
To watch the video, please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
Gain unlimited access to over 1,800 articles and expert Q&A videos.
Already a Recovery Library member? Log in to listen to the full recording.


My husband has been identified as a sex addict. We have been married ten years. He has acted out with numerous women throughout our marriage that started with inappropriate behavior, sexting, then sexually acting out. This comes from a history of sexual trauma. According to him he has always felt inadequate, lonely, fragile and not good enough. We are in 3rd week of EMS Online and I’m not flooding as much. The hurtful sexual images don’t dominate my mind. Now that it isn’t not as painful I find that I want to indulge in the random thoughts of the other women when they come to mind. Either I play out how he chose me or think about how he’s rejected them! Is this helpful to healing? I know we are to reclaim our spouses and just want to make sure I’m not doing more harm than good. I don’t want to fixate on them but feel drawn to the thoughts.



RL_Media Type: 

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas