Q&A Why Have I Chosen Destructive Relationships in the Past?

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Question: 

I'm hoping you will be able to help me figure out why I create friendships at work that tear my marriage apart. Over the last 27 years there have been friendships with people at work that I allowed to take up a great deal of my time, time I could and I should have been giving to my wife and family. The majority of these friendships have been with females and few have been with males. I've caused my wife tremendous sorrow by putting others in front of her needs. At my last job the friendship expanded. With this friendship I chose to lie to my wife regarding interactions with this female friend. My wife asked me to stop helping this woman in non job-related ways. I circumvented my wife's request and lied to my wife about it. Please help me to understand my behavior and how I can change thank you.

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