Q&A How Can We Create Safety in This Situation?

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We're 20 months from when he tried to begin an affair right in front of me. My last D-Day was 6 months ago. I'm currently in Harboring Hope. There was verbal and emotional abuse for years on me and our son. Very subtle, so I'm still having difficulty with that. Recently, I tried to go onto his computer because he was telling me he was an open book. I was trying to see if he WAS an open book and had no intention of going further. Password changed. Because of that, I tried email accounts. Passwords changed. I mentioned the computer and he said he HAD to change it. He wouldn't explain more than that. I didn't even ask about the email passwords. The big issue is that we have a notebook with all of our passwords in it, and it has always been updated. Not now. He hasn't come to me with information; I've had to tell him what I've found in order for him to talk about it at all. Our marriage counselor seems to side with him that I'm invading his privacy. It doesn't matter that the email passwords were changed 10 MONTHS ago and I've not checked in that long. What do I do next? I'm super frustrated and almost done. I'm 60 and scared. Our son is in college, so will be on his own soon.



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