Q&A Can You Help Me Reframe My Thinking?

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Question: 

My husband takes full responsibility and is patient and supportive to me in my pain. He is now the husband I have always wanted. I cognitively understand the pain and brokenness that made him vulnerable to his affair. However, it is still hard for me to focus empathy and compassion, as he chose to deceive and betray me for over a year. I can’t help but feel that he got away with everything. No one else knows about the affair. It was over 10 years ago and he suffered no outward consequences in terms of family, social, or professional repercussions, etc. Everyone sees him as a strong Christian, and a dedicated husband and father of good moral character. I know he feels deeply remorseful for the impact it has on me. He is thankful for my forgiveness (in progress) and God’s forgiveness. But since I am committed to stay, he did not lose me or our relationship. He also did not lose our exclusivity as he chose to give that away. I know he is suffering from witnessing the pain he created, but my selfish, shallow side feels like once I heal and we move on, he will have gotten away with it and will always have this special and exciting chapter in his life tucked away, and I am not part of it. I know this is not how he views it. Can you help me reframe my thinking?

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Wondering how you would

Wondering how you would approach this for those who are agnostic? What are these internal consequences of which you speak?

What type of affair was it?

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