Q&A How Can a Betrayed Spouse Be Happier Than They Were before the Affair?

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I have heard a lot of the people on Affair Recovery videos say their marriages were better or their spouses were better husbands and wives after an affair. How can a betrayed spouse be happier than they were before the affair? How is this possible after knowing your spouse had carnal knowledge with an affair partner and caused you the worst pain you’ve ever experienced in your life?



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Such great advice here!

Such great advice here!
We are 6 months out and every week gets better. I could have never imagined that we would be where we are today after D-day on January 18. I was a wreck, I could barely function. My trauma was so great that I dropped 10 lbs in about 2 weeks and slept only 3 hours a night for weeks.
Contrast that to now. Last week we spent 3 nights at a lodge celebrating our 26th anniversary and we laughed, cried, talked honestly, and hiked (even stepped off the trail to indulge in a moment of passion). I never saw myself in this healed place even two months ago. What we have now is a huge improvement over last year’s marriage (when the infidelity was occurring) and in all the 25 years before. We are finally being real, expressing our deepest needs, and comforting each other as we mourn the place where we ended up in our marriage. Neither of us ever wanted that.
I can’t wait to see where we’ll be in a year.
We are in week 9 of EMSO. We see our counselor weekly, a truly gifted man. My husband sees him alone a few times a month. We’re reading “Hold Me Tight” together. We also pray together every morning and every evening, and sometimes during random times throughout the day. We do a daily bible study also.
I prayed a few months ago for a miracle. I said, “God, I’m 64 years old and I don’t have years and years to work on this. Can you speed up the healing?”
He’s been honoring that request!

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-D, Texas