Q&A How can I be Certain my Spouse has Disclosed Everything?

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I'm 3 months post discovery of my husband's affair with a colleague. It started summer 2012 with a close friendship. My husband tried to separate from me in November but agreed to work on our marriage and moved in with his parents. In December his friendship progressed to kissing and this continued until August 2014. He moved home to me in December 2012.

He tells me that he only ever met her in his car once a week or so. They talked. They kissed. He's adamant they never had any sexual contact of any kind. She believed he was separated and he told her he wasn't ready for another relationship. He stopped seeing her and started making excuses about seeing her until she finally got fed up I guess and she told me about it on Twitter in February 2015. I did not respond and I did not get anything other than basic information from her revealing posts.

About a month ago the AP's friend attacked me on Twitter stating something along the lines of "how happy could your marriage be if he's been f***ing someone else for two years". My husband is furious and says they're just trolling me, trying to cause unnecessary pain and acting in an "if I can't have you then nobody can" manner.

So how do I believe him? He knows that any sexual contact is a deal breaker for me. I am barely surviving knowing he kissed her. But has this "friend" has provided me with the proof I need? I've had to remove myself from all social media to protect myself. How can I be sure that my husband has disclosed everything to me? I feel like I'm reluctant to heal just in case I get hurt again.

It's important for me to state that my husband and I had sex regularly throughout his affair.



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