Q&A How Do I Best Decide If I Stay or If I Go?

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Question: 

D-Day #1 was January 2016, My husband had been seeing prostitutes for 2 years, when I discovered what was going on. He expressed remorse, promised to cease the behavior, was ok with my viewing emails, text messages etc... We've been married 20 years, we have two middle school age children. I believed we were making great strides to rebuilding trust and moving past this. In May 2017, I discovered he had made inappropriate advances toward a massage therapist. He asked her to give him a hand job, she was repulsed and left the room immediately. It resulted in his being "banned" from returning to this legitimate spa. I'm still in shock. He says he's devastated, wants to go to therapy and will do anything to prevent a divorce. I love him, but I don't know if I can ever trust him again. I don't want our children to go through a divorce. Ironically, this second discovery is far worse than the first and there was no actual sex (he propositioned, she declined). I just don't get it. I'm attractive, I'm fit, I'm sexually, emotionally and spiritually available to him (all his words, not mine). I don't think he could ever understand how devastating his behavior has been.

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