Q&A How Do I Reconcile These Opposing Views?

I am 12 weeks out from D-Day and we have three young children. I have been working diligently on myself and healing myself after about the 3 week point but clearly still struggle this early on. I am a child of divorce myself. I was raised by my mother and essentially did not have a relationship with my father. I have a very strong belief that if we did not have children, I ABSOLUTELY would not be staying around to attempt reconciliation. I would leave. There isn't a doubt in my mind I would leave. However, I currently do have a desire to attempt reconciliation (or at least it currently feels this way). I have put significant effort individually and in counseling on this topic. I do NOT believe I am "staying for the kids". I believe my children and all parties involved actually would be okay if a divorce occurred. However, the confusion this creates in my head and heart is quite intense. I don't know how I can so strongly know I would leave if no kids were involved but now sincerely attempt reconciliation for the sake of my marriage.