Q&A Why Isn't There Acknowledgement That Infidelity Is a Form of Abuse?

To watch the video please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
To watch the video, please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
Gain unlimited access to over 1,800 articles and expert Q&A videos.
Already a Recovery Library member? Log in to listen to the full recording.


I am in week 12 of EMS Online and have not seen any information addressing the fact that infidelity and betrayal are actually a form of abuse through manipulation, control, and gas lighting. Why isn't this acknowledged? I think this is valuable information for the betrayed and the betrayer to know and to understand the seriousness of the situation.



RL_Media Type: 


In my opinion ALL infidelity is abusive. For example I would never had sex with my unfaithful husband had I known he was having an affair. In that way I was abused by him. I dare say raped. When we deceived by a spouse due to infidelity we are abused. I normally agree with Wayne but this time he missed the mark for me.

Thank you for addressing this

Thank you for addressing this. The word abuse is thrown around so much that the lines start to get blurred. There is no justification for an affair. That being said there are too many labels getting slapped on personal opinions and it’s just too broad of a term. Great question and great response.

I am surprised by this

I am surprised by this response. It is abusive to me in that the unfaithful spouse is making decisions on behalf of the betrayed spouse that don't take into consideration the physical and emotional well being of the betrayed spouse. How is that not abusive? To me that is the definition of abuse.

I wish this question would

I wish this question would have been addressed differently too. I many times feel like people want me to stay with the man who abused me, by being unfaithful many times, lying, gaslighting etc. I feel like it is abuse myself. I wish he would of went into more explanations of when it is could be or isn’t. Could you please address this question again?

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas