Q&A How Can We Create Safety in the Workplace?

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Question: 

My husband submitted his retirement letter a few days after D-Day five months ago. He had five year affair with a coworker who he is mentoring to take over his job. He must continue to work with her and sees her at least twice a week until his planned retirement which is eight months away. He has been offered another administrative position which would allow him to continue to work with much less time exposed to the affair partner but there would still be some contact. He asked my opinion as to what he should do. He has been so depressed about losing this job that he loves and I feel his resentment about that. He is making efforts to help me feel safe but there is still much defensiveness and reactivity when I bring up my triggers. I am especially triggered when I know he has any contact with the affair partner. I have told him it is his choice but it would not be an option at all unless he resumed individual and couples counseling. We are currently doing EMSO. What would you recommend?

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