Q&A How Do I Help My Husband Become More Romantic?

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As the betrayed spouse, I want my husband to make a lot of the effort as we begin to reconcile & reconnect. I see him taking baby steps in being the leader in our recovery. I really want him to take the lead in the romance department, too, as I think that I was the more romantic person before discovering his infidelity. I don’t want to offer him suggestions to only have him do what I suggested. I don't see any real effort put forth in doing that. Can you suggest some resources (books, lists, websites, etc) with romantic things he could pick from to help us as a couple? My online searches display lots of things to do, yet, I find them lacking with regard to infidelity, which I think makes it a bit different. Thank you in advance!



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Additional question

I my case, I have the same problem and I'm having trouble digesting that even though he was and is emotionally shut out from me, he had no trouble letting the OW in. He had no trouble complimenting her and conveying his sympathy/support for her. If I was upset about something at work, he would say "I'm a guy, we don't listen" and walk out to another room. However, he told his AP at work - "I am always there to listen, as best as a guy can"... I can't teach him what he already knows rather than your first statement "you can't teach what's not there".

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