About my husband NOT ALLOWING ME to delete the post MYSELF.
HOW do I deal with the pain of HIM taking it upon himself to delete the blog post (incidentally the blog post was nothing more than 1 sentence which had her name and town and HOME WRECKING WHORE). There was nothing else there.

Also important to know that I didn't post anything related to my husband or his info/name/etc.

He says he wants it all deleted and he has "the "right reasons" to take it down" - he says he doesn't want it the post to give her any excuse to contact him and doesn't want it to come back around and hurt me/us and the progress we've made now or down the line if she wants to retaliate? But he fails to understand how much it hurt ME that he took it upon HIMSELF to alienate me and any trust we were starting to build when he hacked into my accounts and deleted the blog. That was something I WANTED TO DO MYSELF... HE CHOSE himself to make that decision FOR ME in a lying deceitful way...when I found out minutes later it was deleted I knew he'd been the one to delete it. When I asked him "were you going to tell me you hacked my accounts and deleted it?" He responded "I DONT KNOW".

So HOW AM I supposed to build trust?? Get past his alienating my feelings by hacking my stuff and deleting it?

I had NO control over ANYTHING HE DID those 9 months... This small thing was THE ONLY THING I COULD CONTROL...yet he took it away.

Just like he took away my option to :

- attempt to fix our marriage prior to his affair had he been open and honest
- make the choice to end or marriage or not
- go back to counseling or not
- separate or not
- have an open marriage or not

I'm extremely disappointed that he chose to delete this blog and it was truly something I WANTED TO DO ON MY TERMS AND TIME WITH HIM....BY MY SIDE. which would have been MY attempt to show HIM I WAS WORKING on things.... TRYING TO SHOW HIM I'm a better person....sadly it'll never happen now and he'll NEVER KNOW how/if/when/why I was going to delete it when he made that choice to do it for me...and then tell me he didn't know if he'd have ever told me...not sure which is worse?

Still stuck

I forgot to add the reason I DID ADD HER info to this known cheaters website was because MY husband is a computer wiz and often utilizes google for everything ...

Since he supposedly technically ended the affair and finally after a make/break ultimatum...he emailed her 9/29/14 a DO NOT CONTACT ME I AM TRYING TO SORT OUT MY LIFE AND FIX MY MARRIAGE to his AP... HOWEVER since then has admitted to googling her on several occasions - he says "just to see if there was anything out there he might need to know".

LIKE WHAT??? That maybe she'd been arrested for prostitution? That she was scamming wealthier older men (she's 25 with a 6 year old he's 44...)

Perhaps if he'd googled her when they first met and saw a post like mine he'd never have gotten involved with this girl????

For decades police departments have used billboards, internet, other social media to "call out" dead beat dads, prostitutes and those soliciting them, drug dealers, murders etc....why NOT share her info and what she's done to our family in hopes another married man and HIS FAMILY won't suffer what myself and 2 young daughters have???

WHY SHOULDNT WOMEN WHO KNOWINGLY GET INVOLVED WITH MARRIED MEN BE PUBLICLY SHAMED AND HUMILIATED (as those of us who've been betrayed)???

There's not a doubt in MY MIND HEART OR SOUL that says she WOULDNT think twice going forward in her life and destroy another family like she did mine...

Especially considering she was getting changed IN a HOCKEY RINK LOCKER ROOM (WHICH IS BASICALLY 99.9% men)....and any self respecting WOMAN would have a moral compass strong enough to use the WOMENS bathroom or separate area to undress. I BELIEVE she was
ACTIVELY LOOKING FOR SOME SUCKER TO WALK Into that locker room and that was MY husband WALKED THROUGH THAT DOOR.

WHY NOT WARN OTHER MEN AND WOMEN about this girl??