"I can't believe this is my story."

Perhaps you've had a similar thought or even said some version of this aloud. It's an unfortunately natural response amongst those who have found themselves grappling with the life-shattering impact of infidelity. This is true for a betrayed spouse trying to make sense of events after a disclosure, and for a wayward spouse who recognizes that, despite their intentions, they have strayed very far from "I do."

We are all "living a story" with our everyday lives. We constantly share, tell, and listen to others' stories as a way to make sense of our own life and the world around us — especially when we are in the midst of intense suffering. We cling onto other experiences of hope and healing like a person gasping for fresh air after being held underwater for too long.

Yet, what we tend to forget is that the version of the story we hear from individuals or couples full of hope and healing was not what they originally experienced nor was it how they've told it. They, at one point in their journey when all hope was lost, also said: "I can't believe this is my story."

At one point, they also stood in disbelief, unsure of what the future held. But it is the iterations of their story that should give us immense hope and illustrate that, while the events of a story will remain permanent, the narrative in how it's told can (and will) change over time.

It isn't that if we put our heads in the sand for awhile, the events will change—we can't do that. Instead, if we do the work necessary to heal, we'll come across an opportunity to perceive our story and tell it from a different vantage point.

Depending on where you are in the recovery process, this might sound completely ludicrous. We know you might feel this way because we have felt similarly. But if it were possible, what could the rewriting look like? How and when can we possibly pick up the pen and begin?

In today's video, our founder, Rick Reynolds and one of our bloggers, Candace, introduce a new face to the Affair Recovery team, Jeremy, and discuss how one can possibly rewrite their story to experience freedom on the other side of infidelity.

We hope you find both inspiration and hope that one day, the story you tell will be different. If you long for that healing work but are unsure of where to start, explore our courses or schedule a call with one of our intake specialists. We have real people available to support you in your next step toward healing.