Q&A How Do I Proceed with Recovery Work When the Betrayed Doesn't Want to Get Help?

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Question: 

My husband and I are 15 months from D-Day and the affair was 8 years ago. We have completed EMS Online and I am in individual counseling. I was the wayward spouse. My husband revealed to me after D-Day that he was addicted to pornography. We did EMS Online as me being unfaithful, but never him. He doesn't want to go to counseling, says he doesn't have time to journal, and feels that any safety measures such as pictures and texts of where he is or what he is doing feels unfair since I was the unfaithful one. He doesn't know if he wants to stay married, as he feels like all of this is a waste of time. How do I proceed with recovery work when he doesn't want to get any help? I realize this is my fault, but I feel until he takes complete responsibility for his own infidelity, seeks help for both our marriage and himself, and commits to some form of work, there's no hope for us. I will continue my recovery regardless. I can't control my spouse, only me. But when is it time to say enough?

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